Does IVF stand for I’m Very Freaked…?

why you should never pick up a stranger's baby...

needles shcmeedles, it’s the end result that matters most…

If you ask someone who’s been through it, they’ll tell you that IVF is (mostly) a pretty shitful experience. You get loaded up with hormones, have to inject yourself daily (with said dreaded hormones) get to feel puffy, gain weight, go all kind of crazy arse aggro on your family and that’s before you get to go through the horrible awful wait (that is the countdown to 11 days when you can take a pregnancy blood test).

If you know me, you’ll know I love needles (and self injecting) about as much as I love kicking my toe on a supermarket shopping trolley wheel…I freaking hate that sharp pain that goes with it when all you can do to stop yourself from crying/screaming/hitting something is to let out a nice big swearword to dull the pain.

So, for most people IVF is not a pleasant experience. Except for the friend who told me, ‘don’t listen to people when they tell you it’s horrible, don’t listen to people when they tell you it’s scary, awful or painful…my IVF experience was wonderful and this is your journey, and yours alone. Let it be a beautiful one’. You know what, it was like she was Mr Miyagi telling the Karate Kid to find his ‘inner peace’. Those words were the best advice I could have ever got because every girl’s experience is different from the next. Not every woman has pain, or swelling, or vomiting or mood swings or sore needle sites.

But hold on to your white undies my little Beliebers because it’s not all rosey tinted glasses up here in IVF land. I am scared as a cornered Christmas turkey. I am worried it won’t take and it does sting a bit when those sharp little needles puncture your skin like a crack junkie (though I suspect their needles are slightly thicker and hurt a bit more). There are lots of blood tests (can we quit it with the needles already?!) scans and waiting…all of which I’m not fond of either.

I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’m freaking the hell out. I’d also be telling little fibbies if I didn’t say there are the odd side effects but I figure if I tell all my friends, family and pretty much everyone I know that I could basically take out their eyeballs with my bare fingernails at any given moment, I think we should all be pretty safe.

Love and hugs, Lady Mama Gxox

2 thoughts on “Does IVF stand for I’m Very Freaked…?

  1. Deanne Needham says:


    I just wanted to wish you all the very best with your IVF journey. I too tried the ‘take it as it comes’ approach knowing that it would be a different experience for everyone. I too only had to use this new technology for baby number two, which is a little easier as you escape the difficult angst of ‘will I ever be a mother’ and feel so grateful for the child you have.

    I am now 22 weeks pregnant because IVF does a great job of overcoming issues like blocked tubes and, in my case, sperm that was not good at penetrating my eggs. I think one of the hardest things I found with the experience was that IVF medical staff tend to be conservative about your chances of getting pregnant because they don’t want to get your hopes up. Once I realised this, it made me feel more relaxed and optimistic.

    Once again, all the very best.


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