A little over twelve years ago, well that many plus a few hours or so, my life changed forever. It’s hard to ever imagine a time when you weren’t in it, my little nugget (I know you hate me calling you that but it’s better than the name ‘Peanut’ we called you when you were in my belly wouldn’t you say?). And that sound you hear is the sniffle of your mother not dealing with the fact her ‘Bubs’ (another name you’ve told me not to use and I promise I’ll stop, soon) is almost up to her shoulders and just a cat’s bum whisker away from being a teenager. Too soon. Way too soon. I need more time.
I swear you were only just starting out as a preppy, a big navy blue bag strapped to your back like a rocket launcher that probably weighed more than you did and a slight breeze would have swept you clean over, like yesterday…I can see your little blonde candy floss hair blowing in the wind the first time the training wheels came off and you were racing like hell to the end of the street, me chasing after you ready to catch the fall you never made…
When, with your proud beaming smile, you became the little man in my life to give me away and almost broke the sound barrier, skipping me that fast down the aisle I had to check my heels for smoke. You didn’t care that it meant you had to share your mum with someone else, you were more excited that we got to share you.
I know you’re like super dupa excited about growing up, reaching your goal height of 6ft 2, doing the things grown up boys do and all…but your mum over here? Well she ain’t quite so excited. Slow down, I want to yell. Stop growing. Stop getting big. Stop turning into a fine young lad before my eyes and my heart can’t take it.
I love that even though it’s not cool to hug your mum when we’re out, you still sneak your hand in mine and squeeze it tight. How you apologise about hurting my feelings because you don’t want your face to be painted for halloween. And I even love that when you got a detention at school for not wearing the right uniform (yes, I’ll let it go that it was for the third time) and told the head of the junior school you were worried about upsetting me because ‘my mum’s very hormonal right now’.
I love that you still kiss us goodnight and talk to your dog like he’s your best mate in the whole world.
I know you’re in a hurry to get big…it’s just that your mum isn’t.
Happy birthday to the greatest thing I ever did…Lov’n’ big ol’ hugs, your MamaG xxox